Hectic to Rested - Confessions of a Former Workaholic

When did being a workaholic get upgraded to a virtue in the church?

I don't know either.  I do know that it isn't God’s pattern. If God was a workaholic, he wouldn't have rested on the 7th day. If you haven’t already, please read Part One of this series. It’s a little longer than this article but it’s a good reminder of some of the foundational verses concerning rest and work. Wish I’d walked out those verses in my younger years.  Some of you  sweet sisters are involved with and in charge of waaaaaaaaay too many things.

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That has to stop.

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Chronic exhaustion used to be my default setting. I didn’t know how to live in the rest and peace of God (Hebrews 4). I’d go, go, go, until I collapsed with a flu, cold or extreme fatigue. I didn’t understand God’s principles of rest at all.  Never even heard the idea till I was in my forties. How sad is that?  I don’t want you to waste any more years living that way or anything that looks like it.

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Simplifying an over-committed life is not easy. Everyone will not support your decisions. Remember though, God is on your side. If you share your heart with your spouse, I believe they will be too. I know my husband, Ken, was thrilled when I got off the work-collapse-work-collapse merry go round.

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First, I needed to step out in faith and ask God to help me believe and walk out truth that was new to me.

​ I believed that God did not want me to live in exhaustion anymore. Jesus did not live that way. It made sense to me that God didn’t want for any of his children to be hamsters continuously spinning their wheels.

​By faith, I laid all my ministries and dreams before God and opened my hands. I invited him to put in and take out of my life whatever he desired. I literally laid on the floor with my hands up, crying out to Him.

​By faith, I listened to Father for specific directions about which of my responsibilities and commitments needed to change. Some needed  to go away completely. Restorative activities needed to be in my schedule weekly. I seriously did not have a single restful hobby until I was in my forties. Everything I did in my free time, I managed to turn into work that drained me, instead of refreshing me.

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By faith, I obeyed what I heard God say and started stepping down and back from  some ministries and roles. I did this in a proper way, agreeing to stay put for a specified amount of time until my replacement was found.

By God's grace,  I endured the disappointment, and anger of people from whom I pulled back.  I kept treating them kindly. To them, it all felt so personal. “Why is she stepping away from MY committee, MY cause, etc.” Lots of tears and hurt feelings during this stage. Seriously, don't be a diva during this stage making it all about YOUR rest and YOUR needs. None of them forced you to over commit but they are now paying a price because you did. 

 I trusted God to change my thinking and lifestyle patterns.  I knew I couldn’t do it. Developing habits of rest and refreshment was like learning a new language. I knew I would fail if I tried to just power through and would turn that into work like I did everything else. I promise, if you open yourself like this to God he will lead and teach you just like he did me.

 I learned to listen better to God before I said “Yes,” to anything. Now, I never enter something new without taking at least a night, often longer, to pray, listen to God, and talk to my husband. Sometimes great opportunities simply aren’t YOUR things to do right now in God’s overall plan. Good things and God things are different.

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People who loved me for me, not the work I could do, never stopped supporting me, even though some of them were disappointed not to work alongside me anymore.

God will also use a season of simplifying as a filter for people

who only valued your production value.

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I pray this helps you sweet ones who know you’ve got to make a change but dread the process. I won’t kid ya, parts of it were a hot mess, but it was worth it. My family bore the brunt of me giving all my best energies to ministries, volunteer work and even friendships. I didn’t often have much left for the people in my house.

It’s so worth it to establish patterns that mimic Christ’s work and rest flow. Your family and husband will be so blessed to have a more peaceful mom and wife.